This recap is dedicated to Mike & Donna Waters, as they’ll be
celebrating their 26th wedding anniversary this Friday.
Congratulations!

To everyone in the bubba Army, have a safe, and happy memorial day.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Segment 1 – Sports, Corvette discussions

The show started off with audio of the Rays losing. Bubba said today
is when they’ll narrow down the Tom the Treeman replacement, he thinks
the umpire for the Rays game was a jackass, he thinks the guy
shouldn’t even do T ball this weekend, Spice said the guy in question
is Bob Davidson, Manson said Bubba will be able to heckle him all
night, Bubba said he’ll be doing that, he thinks Blind Lawrence
could’ve made better strike calls, while having his fake eye out, he
then said Twenty-five and Spice took the Corvette out, he thinks his
Adderall had worn off after a while. Spice said the heads up display
on the car is the coolest thing ever, Bubba thinks they made that for
guys who have to sit on a phone book, Manson wasn’t sure what that
was, Spice explained it. They then went to commercials a few seconds
later.

Segment 2 – Bubba at a spin class?

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for Bubbapalooza in
Canada. Bubba plugged the latest stuff on Btls.com and BubbaRaw.com,
he then said that on My TV Tampa Bay (channel 38), on Sunday at 11:00,
some footage from Bikes for Badges will be featured, he then said he’s
been known to get a McFropay in the afternoon. Spice said there’s
something he doesn’t’ like about Star Bucks guy, Manson said the guy
is a douchebag. Bubba said his problem is the guy who sits there ad
crosses his legs, having a one-sided conversation, Spice said he’d
like to do dress up day, Bubba shot the idea down, Spice isn’t sure if
he even has anything like that, Bubba said that Brent has had to be
really nice to the WGN people, he said he’s not a tuck the shirt in
kind of guy. Spice said when he was on TV, they treat you like gold in
the beginning, after the taping, your stuff is out in the street, he
said it’s very strange, he thinks the people at WGN will be kissing
Bubba’s ass, he said the audience was made of actors, Bubba said
they’re worried about the fat host, he thinks Spin class is a rib, he
said he’ll do it his way, he thinks his error was that he didn’t have
a jock strap, he said his testicals were hitting the pointy end of the
bike, he said it’s an amazing cardio workout, he thinks some of the
other guys could do Spin class the way normal people do it, he said it
goes fast, he said he got in trouble when he asked Heather if he could
bring his PSP to the Spin Class, Heather said he wouldn’t have time
for that, they then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 3 – Birthdays, emails, baseball discussions

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the Btls Newsletter.
Bubba said the music for today was provided by Big dick, he asked
Spice to remind him to select the music for the return, he then said
Erick from Oakley’s wife had a miscarriage. The guys goes over some
birthdays, Bubba said he never got Bobcat Goldthwait, we then heard
“Country Boys Can Survive” by Hank Williams JR, Spice said he’d like
to see his portfolio. Manson said he practically grew up with Brent
Musburger, Spice said he always had a good back-story, Bubba said he’s
doing it all off the top of his head, he said it’s not like that
anymore, Spice thinks the reporters aren’t all that impressive. The
first email of the day thinks the guys were making fun of the Britney
Murphy 911 call in auto-tune, Bubba said that’s why they through it to
the listeners, Manson said they wanted to hear it, Spice said they’ve
never been labeled classy, he then goofed on Bubba crying. Another
emailer asked if he could bring his kids to the meet and Greet, Bubba
said no, Manson said his kids were bugging him. Another emailer was a
copy of an article about the Obama administration backing the Vatican,
Bubba said he’s disgusted by it. Manson said if Obama had the Pope
arrested, he’d be happy. Another emailer said Rick and Bubba have
bumper stickers. Another emailer said the Power Pig had a contest of
burying a woman up in sand, Bubba explained it; he said the last place
Mark chase would send him to would be a beach. Another emailer said
they researched Dr. Dan Diaco with tummy tucks, the emailer wondered
if the patrons should complain if he’s done a great job. Bubba said he
knows a woman who visited Dan for a boob consultation, Dan told her
she needed to lose about 10-15 pounds, he thinks Dr. Dan Diaco should
have the Jack Nickelson sounder. The last email of the day said they
heard the guys talking about Enrique Oliu (May 14, 2010), the emailer
said they could get him on the air. Bubba said the owner of Travis the
chimp died, he then played a clip of Carl Crofferd getting a bad call,
Spice said even the Redsocks fans were saying how the call went down,
Bubba thinks madden is the man, Manson said they’re almost kissing, he
thinks the guy will get it good tonight. We then heard a clip about a
guy getting thrown out of a game, Bubba cracked up at it, Spice said
it was actually Jimmy Kimmel doing a bit. They then went to
commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 4 – New Lightning owner, Mindy Mccready mom’s, chimp owner dies

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the show’s Twitter
page. We then heard a news clip about the Redwings GM owning the
Lightning, Bubba thinks the guy is money. We then heard a 911 call
involving Mindy McCready’s Mom, Bubba thinks they should have her on
the show, Spice said the Mom might’ve done this to set up the case,
Bubba thinks it’s ridiculous, Spice joked that Billy McKnight was
calling in. We then heard a clip of Mindy from April 27, 2010, where
she discusses being on “Celebrity Rehab”, Bubba said this was almost a
month ago. We then heard a clip of Billy McKnight on the show from
April 28, where Billy claims he never punched her, saying they “Got
Slappy”. We then heard a news clip about Travis the Chimp’s owner
passing away from a ruptured aortic aneurysm. We then heard “Eyes
Ripped Off her Face” from “bubba’s New and Misc hits Vol. 9” track 8,
and “the Clemulus Package” disc 2, track 5, then into “Bad Monkey”
from “Bubba’s New and Misc hits Vol. 9” track 1, and “the Clemulus
Package” disc 1, track 7. They then went to commercials a few seconds
later.

Segment 5 – Tom the Treeman tryouts – Milk challenge

Coming out of commercials, we heard a Spanish bumper. Spice told Bubba
to select next week’s music, which he then did.

1.      Tuesday – Miller
2.      Wednesday – Ned
3.      Thursday – Grant
4.      Friday – Spice

We then heard a promo for the new tom the Treeman. Bubba had Andy in,
Andy said he’s alive, he said he wrestled for WRF, he said he lives in
Orlando, he said he doesn’t want to be another Tom; he said he wants
to be his own guy. Miguel said he’s been on the show before, saying he
was part of the first Mexican Olympics (May 5, 2008). Auggy said he’s
six foot six,
Bubba thinks he should have a tazer ready, Auggy said he was a cop,
Manson said the guy looks like Jughead on roids. Bubba said he can’t
boss the guy around. Dave said he has a girlfriend, he’s not in any
rush, he said the highest tree he’s ever jumped out of was 40 feet.
Gordo came in, Bubba thinks he’s a poor man’s Brett Michaels, he said
the guy was bit by a Rattle snake, Gordo said the scar on his arm was
from branding, Bubba thinks the guy should’ve know the snake was
badass, as it swam on water. Gordo said he got his ass to the boat
ramp as soon as possible, he said they tried to tell him it was all in
his head. Bubba said Gordo pierced his own nipples, Bubba thinks they
have a winner, Spice as Tom said the guy is awesome. The guys cracked
up when Gordo said he double socked his stuff, as he forgot to take
his jock strap. Bubba thinks they should get the guy a vasectomy, he
then said the first challenge is the Milk challenge. Spice explained
how it will work, he said the first two who puke are out, Bubba thinks
they’ll have two Tom the Treeman. The guys who are still in will
participate in the remaining three contests.

1.      Pubic Hair Burrito
2.      Shock the boys
3.      Slingshot challenge

Bubba said this gives the guys 25 minutes to drink as much milk as
possible. Spice wondered how Miguel did in the Mexican Olympics,
Miguel thinks he got third. Bubba said if you’re about to puke, you
have to let someone know, Gordo said he’s a beer chugger, Auggy asked
if he could pretend like he’s retarded. Bubba said the Amityville
Horrors house is for sale, he wondered if any of the guys would live
in it, Spice said no, one of the guys said he would, Bubba told the
guys they can’t participate. Brent said he’d pass, just because it
sounds creepy, Spice said he always asks if someone was killed in the
house, Manson said it’s just creepy. We then heard a news clip about
the oil spill,
Bubba wonders what’s taken Obama so long, he thinks it’s taking so
long because of the quantity of oil, Spice said it’s like the Blob,
Bubba thinks they should’ve gotten a Buddha Rice Crispy treat, he said
that gas has gone down, he thinks it’s a move by BP to improve public
opinion, he then got distracted by a phone going off, Miguel said
he’ll take a bat hit for that, Manson said he was laughing at it,
Miguel asked Bubba if that was all he had. Scott said he loves the
show, he said BP knows what they’re doing, he said they could’ve
crushed the well within the first few days, he said they’re just
trying to preserve it. Rob in Orlando said the reason why they
haven’t’ done it sooner, is that they’d lose the rights to the land.
Andy vomited, Bubba told him he could stick around or leave, Andy said
he’ll stick around. Miguel said he made himself puke, Gordo said he
got puked on, Dave said he feels full. Rob asked who the largest
distributer of BP’s money, Manson thought it was McCaine/Palin, the
guy said $22,000,000 was given to the Obama administration. Nick asked
if the bubba Army should boycott BP, Bubba thinks they should do that,
Spice said he’ll go into a BP store and buy stuff other than gas, he
thinks Miguel is going to puke, Miguel said his temperature is up,
Bubba told him to make a final run, he thinks Gordo is trying to stair
him down,
Gordo said if Miguel hurls, he’ll be done anyway, he said he’ll puke,
as he doesn’t want all that milk in him. Bubba said they’ve got Auggy,
Dave and Gordo still in the contest, we then heard the tymbal. Spice
said Gordo was about to do it, Bubba thinks Gordo has some technique,
Manson said it was the most controlled puke ever. Auggy said he had to
poop, Bubba told him he couldn’t do that. Dave thinks he’s going to
puke pretty soon, he then puked, Bubba thinks it was standard, Manson
said it came out the nose, Dave suggested Spice Auto-tune that. Bubba
said he’ll give 300 bucs to anyone who will take a cup of it and drink
it, Gordo said he had to puke again, he said he needed to smell the
puke to get it going, the guys were cracking up at it, he said
everyone has their own style. Bubba upped the offer to 350 for half a
glass, Manson said Miguel has been spitting in the barrel for the past
five minutes, Bubba said he didn’t need that reminder. We then heard
the sound of the puke being stared, Manson said he can’t watch this,
Bubba said he’ll do 375, Gordo said he’ll do it, under the condition
that he have a Miller Lite on deck, Bubba said the guy needs to prove
that the glass is empty, Gordo then drank the glass, Spice almost
gagged when he saw the cup, Manson said it was vile, Spice as Tom said
the guy was awesome. They then went to commercials a few seconds
later.

Segment 6 – Tom the Treeman tryouts – Pubic hair burrito

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the concept best of
shows, then into “Bubba Radio Theater – BP President”, then into Ned’s
“F BP”. Bubba thinks Dick is pandering with his bumper music
selections, he said hi to some guys who might be listening to the
replay, he wonders if DWT makes something for Spice’s bike, Spice said
a lot of the nudist colonies have awesome golf carts. We then heard
the promo for the Tom the Treeman try outs. Bubba went over the
remaining participants; he thinks Gordo has been very personality
based. Spice said all three are stuffed, he said they’ll judge them on
who keeps it down; Gordo said he’s a slow eater. Auggy said Tom is
more retarded than he is, Gordo thinks he could drop Auggy if he
punched him hard enough, Bubba thinks Gordo couldn’t reach him. Bubba
asked Gordo what he’s on, Gordo said no sleep. Bubba said you’ll be
eliminated if you don’ finish. Auggy said this stuff is beautiful, he
then asked for some water, Spice said they’re stuffed, Dave said you
know it’s there. Gordo said he’s chewing, trying not to think about
what he’s eating. Bubba said everyone gets a little money for showing
up. Bubba thinks Auggy is about to puke, he said that would get them
eliminated, Spice said he can’t wait to meet Gordo’s wife. Auggy said
he’s been married every so often, he said he’s cheated, he said one of
his ex wives is his girlfriend. Bubba told Auggy not to puke, Gordo
told him to knock himself out, he told Auggy the bucket was calling
his name, Bubba said Gordo will be moving on, he then yelled for Auggy
to swallow it back in, Gordo told Auggy to just throw it up, Bubba
said this is a great visual, he told Gordo he’s one of them, Spice
thinks Dave will vomit, Dave said getting Ned’s hair in his throat was
horrible, Manson said it looked like Taylor Hicks’s hair piece. Bubba
told Dave if he keeps it down, he’ll make it on to the finals. Spice
said Dave was sweating, Dave ended up puking. Bubba said he’ll
transfer all three of the guys to the next round, we then heard the
tymbal, he said Gordo doesn’t have to participate in the shocking the
balls. They then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 7 – Sean Flin calls in

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for “Ned’s 12 Inch meaty
Mandingo (with a side of man sauce)”. We then heard Ned talking about
Memorial day, saying how it’s sad that all we do is eat, he’s
disgusted with what America has come to. Bubba said he’s known Sean
Flin for about ten years, he thinks people are happy with the
Lightning. Sean came on, saying it’s been a while, Bubba thinks he
hasn’t seen him since December of 2002; Brent said they were fired in
February of 2004. Sean said he walked into the Marlins when he went to
the team, he said his ring is the same one a player would get. Bubba
asked how he did that, Sean said his number was higher than the other
players. Bubba thinks they might have a department for complaint calls
if you get screwed out of a ring. Spice thinks going from a hockey
team to a baseball team is different, Sean said he left before the
Lightning won the cup. Spice said they haven’t heard from Orin since
he left town. Bubba asked if the business template is that if you
don’t sell out, you’ll lose money, Sean said it’s vital to sell
tickets at hockey events. Bubba asked if the concert events can cover
a building if the team has a bad season, Sean said no, he said he’s
vice president of marketing. Bubba asked the biggest act Sean has ever
seen go into a building, Sean said Garth Brookes, he said the Stones
made some big money. Bubba asked if the Marlins are doing a new
stadium, Sean said he’s right near one that is getting built, he said
it should open around 2012, Spice said it’ll be about a $515,000,000
ballpark. Bubba said the new thing to do is to downsize, Sean said
it’ll have about 36000 seats, he said you can watch the construction
live on the internet, he said it’s where the Orange bowl used to be.
Spice said he likes how the Marlins do the concerts, he said he’s
excited about the OAR show on June 26, Sean said he’s never seen them
live, Spice said it’s a great show. Bubba thinks the band is the
coolest group he’s ever seen. Sean said from the final out to the
concert, it’s about nine minutes, Spice said he’ll be going to the
game. Bubba asked how Uggla is doing; Sean said he’s doing great.
Spice wondered if the franchise is over it, Sean said it seemed like
everything was cool. Bubba asked about the one guy who can keep people
down, Sean said they’ve got Tony Parez and Andre Dossin. Bubba asked
who the baddest guy on the team is, he thinks it’s the Wes guy, Sean
said he’s a tough guy, he said the number to call is 1-877-Marlins,
the website is marlins.com. Spice thinks he’ll outsike himself when
throwing the first pitch, he said he doesn’t want to pull a
Bababbooey. They then went to commercials a few seconds later.

Segment 8 – Tom the Treeman Tryouts – Shock Collar and slingshot Challenge

Coming out of commercials, we heard a promo for the Tom the Treeman
tryouts. Bubba thinks they’ll have a stable of two or three guys, he
said they renamed one of the guy’s white Trash Bono, as he looks like
him, he thinks Auggy has fat that won’t go away. Dave said he gets
more tan than in other places. Bubba said he’ll just have the guys
challenge each other with the shock collars. He first had it on one,
then to four. Dave said he’ll do a four for four seconds, he said that
saying stop will cause you to lose the round. Auggy said he’ll go four
for five seconds; the guys goofed on his voice. Bubba set the clock
and let Auggy have it, Auggy said it was bad, he then said he’ll do
five for five, Dave said he’ll go for five for six. Bubba let him have
it, Dave was grunting while the guys were laughing. Dave said he’ll
try eight for four, Bubba thinks he’ll steal the round; Auggy said
he’ll go for eight for five. Bubba let him have it, the guys were
cracking up, we then heard the tymbal. Bubba thinks Auggy should go
big, so that Dave couldn’t steal it, he said he’ll go for eight for
seven, Dave said he was sweating, he said he’ll try eight for eight,
he said he’ll tap out on that one. Bubba told Auggy he has to ride out
the eight for eight, the guys cracked up when Bubba messed up, we then
heard the tymbal. Dave said he’ll live, Spice said they’re going to
hit the guys with slingshots. Bubba asked for Brent to come in, Spice
said Gordo was strapped up. Brent came on giving play-by-play. Bubba
thinks they should do ten balls per guy, he thinks if all three guys
make it, he thinks they should do a stunt man rotation. The guys
started firing at Gordo, Bubba ended up missing the first one, he
nailed the second one on Gordo’s chest, Gordo said it was like a
bouncy ball hitting him at 35 mph, the guys cracked up at Gordo
getting hit in the cup, he then gave commentary as he was getting hit,
he thinks Bubba has the only good shot, the guys cracked up at Gordo’s
comments. Bubba had the guys undo him, Hammil got hit in the butt,
Manson thinks you could kill him with a slingshot, Bubba thinks he’s
the slingshot master. Spice said Dave was up on the rack, the guys
took shots at him, Manson got a 108, Dave said he was going to puke,
saying he wanted off. Spice thinks Auggy looks pregnant, Bubba thinks
they may need protection, he thinks one of the balls will bounce back.
Auggy got hit, saying it was awesome, Spice gave play-by-play, Big
dick was heard in the background giving numbers, Spice said he got
hit, he thinks Auggy is like a pregnant wrestler. Bubba wonders why
they have so much fun doing this, he said he’ll peg Chas. Auggy got
hit a few more times, Bubba asked Gordo to step up to the plate, Bubba
thinks he has too much swagger. Spice thinks Auggy will kill Gordo,
Bubba thinks they’ll have to have the shock collar on Auggy if he gets
out of control, the guys cracked up at Auggy with a ball stuck in him.
Dave said he got hit in the sweet spot that makes him puke. Bubba said
Gordo and Auggy are locked in, Dave will be an alternate. Brent said
it was 10:15. Bubba said he has something for Gordo, Gordo asked if he
had to take a wiz quiz, Gordo said he takes some pills for back pain,
he said he takes about two or three oxies a day. Bubba had him pee in
the cup. Auggy said he’s doing nothing, he thinks beating Gordo will
be like hitting a rubber ball, bubba thinks Gordo will have Jabberjaw
pee for him, the guys cracked up at Gordo looking at the test, Brent
read the data, we then heard the tymbal, Gordo asked if he passed,
this had the guys laughing. Bubba told Gordo not to steal for his
habit, Gordo said he works hard. Bubba congratulated Auggy and Gordo
for being the new Tom the Treeman, they then ended the show a few
seconds later.